Wednesday, December 2, 2009

whine. complain. blah, blah, blah

Oh I'm getting crabby. I left work today early because I had this anxious feeling - got all shaky inside and my palms were sweating and I just couldn't sit still. I came home and did some chores - nothing major like deciding to iron my curtains or something equally as uncharacteristic...I felt like 100% better as soon as I walked in the door but before too long that anxious feeling returned. There's a few things contributing to this, I'm sure.
  1. I'm tired of doing this now and I want this baby to get here
  2. Nick pointed out that my shift in attitude came when the doctor said "any day now" - I've been quite impatiently waiting for that "any day" to be NOW
  3. I'm rapidly approaching my due date and every one that knows me, knows I'm impatient and hate to wait. I want what I want when I want it. Hey, what can I say? I'm a product of my decade of indulgence...
I have exactly 2 weeks from today til my due date. I feel like this part is taking forever. I was certain, convinced and would have bet my life on the fact that he was going to decide to come over Thanksgiving break. I mentally left my job and it was so hard to go back. Every day is a struggle - I keep trying to be ready to have a baby and stay at home and take care of him but apparently he's just not ready to come out yet.

I'm trying SO hard to have patience and just wait it out but dang it that's easier said than done. I know d-day is right around the corner and even that isn't an exact date of when that happens. I think that right there is the crux of the problem. It's just a waiting game. The 16th is his estimated arrival...he could come tonight. He could come tomorrow. He could come next Thursday. He could come on the 18th. We just don't know and I HATE the not knowing.

Had my weekly check up on Monday. I hadn't made much progress dilation wise - I was at about a 2. Doctor did a procedure where she stripped my membranes (if you don't know what that is, you can google it - I'm not going in to it here). It was quite an uncomfortable feeling but nothing that I'd absolutely refuse to do again. So far it hasn't worked. Apparently if it is a successful attempt, baby comes with in 24-72 hours. We're at the end of 48 hours and NOTHING. I've had a few - far between - contractions but nothing to write home about. So. Sigh. I'd also gained 2 more pounds so he's chunking up in there.

Poor Nick is avoiding making plans. He's on full red-alert. Eric invited him to the BSU game this Friday and Nick passed - not wanting to be at the game and get a call that I'm in labor. We're just both so ready to get on with the next stage...but the key player has stage fright.

Oh well. In non-whining, non-bitching & moaning news. ha. Susan ordered me the CUTEST baby book that came today. I spent quite some time filling out all the spaces I can right now. I've got to go stick it in the diaper bag to take with us to the hospital (if I ever GO to the hospital...oh...wait...that was whining s'more...whoops). Nick ordered us new phones (we were both due for an upgrade). I have the coooooooolest new phone - it's a Samsung Exclaim. it's got one of those slide out keyboard dealies and I can get on the internet on it and join the rest of the 21st century. ha! Nick ordered himself the Blackberry Curve. it's preeeeeety. So we've been spending all evening playing with our new phones.

So that's my update. Nothing much but a bunch of whining. We're just waiting. And we all know much I just LOVE to wait.

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