Life.

Life, this year, has been a trial. Things keep winging out of left field that I don't even know how to prepare for - things would never even expect to happen, just sort of... happen and I'm left reeling and trying to figure out how to muddle through this one and on to the next.

If I sat down and outlined my entire year, I think I might cry. It's overwhelming and frustrating and hard. So much of it I can't really talk about, so I haven't really had a lot of support getting through. My husband has been amazing. Not the best advise giver, necessarily, but a tremendous rock and an excellent shoulder to cry on. Susan has been another wonderful outlet. There's not a lot she can do, way out in Ohio, but I know I could count on her any time of the day to rage with me over the stupidities of my life this year. I know I have so many friends and family I could call on for the same things, but having these two this year has been amazing.

We are rapidly approaching the end of the year and I'm filled with so many conflicting emotions: Thrill that it's nearly over and such enormous hope that next year is a million gazillion times better than this year.
Dread because we're coming up on the year mark of my mom's passing and I know that'll be hard. Thanksgiving was brutal. I'm hoping Christmas isn't as dramatic and is more peaceful.
Awe that my little boy is going to be turning 2 in just a matter of weeks. Where has the time gone?

Well, that's just a few of them anyway. ;)

I've been doing a little technology related experiment this month and kind of laying off Facebook, Pinterest and all my other online distractions. I'm not posting as much on FB, I'm not pinning as much on Pinterest and I'm not spending as much time on my reader. I have missed it a little bit, but I'm not sure I've been missed. I'm not sure what to think about that. Ha!

Nick's doing well in his new job. It was slow going at first but now that he's actually been assigned a project, I think he's enjoying his work. He spent nearly 2 weeks in Arizona earlier this month and has spent several nights after work with his face glued to his work computer.

I've been in a slump. I haven't been participating in my mommy group much and I'm having a hard time staying motivated to attend the things I said I'd go to. I'm making myself stop that today. I'm going to bookclub tonight (even though I don't really want to). I've read the book, but it was years ago and I don't remember much about what happened. I'm going anyway. No excuses. If anything, it'll be good to get out of the house for a mommy night away.

We haven't put up our tree yet, which isn't like me. Usually the day after Thanksgiving, I've got Christmas all over the house. We've done a little - I decorated the mantle with our stockings and the outside of the house is pretty much done. I just need to slap myself silly and get on with life. These last few weeks have been hard at my house - harder than they've needed to be, but when you have several people with really strong opinions, it's not always roses & sunshine.

So that's life recently. :) I haven't been sharing all my bloggy posts on Facebook lately either. Some are boring (like my menu plan). It's all part of my little experiment, and I think I'll keep sticking with it. A lot of how I've been feeling about myself is due to what I see (or don't see) on Facebook and that's just silly. I'm 30 years old, it's time to start acting that way instead of 13.

So that's what's new in at the Beesley house recently. Not a whole lot (and it doesn't feel like a whole lot of positives to remark on, either), but we'll keep on keeping on. :)